(03) 9020 2905Apparently, life begins at 40. But the party doesn’t last long. Soon after, you sink into a well of depression and want to top yourself.
So says a survey of two million people from 80 countries. Our 40s is the peak of our unhappiness. Age 44, on average, is us at our grumpiest. We hit middle age and get morose at our life being half over. (Or perhaps that our miserable existence is only half done.)
Why? Largely because the teenage kids are feral monsters, work’s a drudge and the hours are painful, the mortgage is still mountainous. Financially, professionally and familially … everything’s harder than we thought it would be at this age.
You’d dreamed of being somewhere by now. Just not here. Bugger!
I’m 40-something. My work hours are stupid. My mortgage is an Everest, and growing, care of an addiction to property investment. But, personally, I’m not feeling like drinking myself into a coma like Nicholas Cage in “Leaving Las Vegas”. (I just did that for fun in my 30s.) Perhaps it’s I started late and the DebtKids are just school-age and still believe their dad knows everything.
Maybe.
But I would also credit it to some words of wisdom I got on the eve of turning 40. It was from a lovely lady called Sue, who among the birthday wishes in an email, typed a line I’ll never forget.
“Your forties is when you make it.”
A bizarrely simple statement. But incredibly right. I’d written an 80,000-word book (“Debt Man Walking”) based on that sentiment. And Sue had just summed up my book in seven words.
For most, the strain of life in your 40s is what sets you up financially for your 50s and beyond.
The long hours, the sacrifices, taking on bigger mortgages to upgrade or renovate, the struggle to pay down the mortgages, educating the kids, biting the bullet to buy investments …
No question, your 40s is hard work.
But depressing? Really?
The study was global. And the statistics say it’s a worldwide phenomenon.
Sure, it can be hard when you’re in the thick of it, but keep an eye on the medium term. The study said we get over it by 50.
For those on the wrong side of 35, and approaching the “darkness” of being middle-aged, or now living it, here are five things to focus on to stop you getting all mid-life crisis-ey.
There’s not a Porsche, an affair, or a gym membership in sight.
It’s about understanding the truth of Sue’s words: “Your forties is when you make it”. The toil of this decade will deliver, eventually, in spades. Suck it up. The sacrifice will be worth it.
One: Your home will become your castle. Your huge mortgage will reduce and your home will increase in value. It will fortify your finances. You’ve got huge debt because you can (see point two).
Two: You are nearly at the peak of your career. The second half of your 40s is when, the averages say, you’ll be earning your highest salary. Make the most of that, without wasting it, because you’ll eventually spend a long time not working. Invest. Invest. Invest.
Three: Your investments will start to pay off. If you’ve bought quality shares and property, know that they will reward you with capital growth and a growing income stream in the next decade and beyond.
Four: Ride the super wave. When you entered your 40s, you were lucky if your super was one year’s salary. By the time you turn 50, it will be more like four times your salary, thanks to contributions and compounding. Superannuation will, magically, turn into something worthwhile.
Five: Your babies, who are currently monsters, will blossom into adults, maybe even ones who like you. The mono-syllabic grunts will, slowly, disappear. The education you suffered to give them will produce some fish. They will get nice jobs and find nice partners. They might even leave home.
It all happens because of your 40s. Don’t blow it. Make sure, while you’re on your knees sweating to pave the path of your future finances, that you smell some of those roses in your castle’s garden.
(And, though I’ve made some light of it here, depression is bloody serious. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, get help. See your doctor or call Lifeline.)
Bruce Brammall is the author of Debt Man Walking (www.debtman.com.au), a licensed financial adviser and mortgage broker. bruce@debtman.com.au.